tall man/small man

MARK TWAIN

2008-06-10T02:43:00.004-04:00

VAL KILMER KILLED A BUFFALO!!!!

APACHE INDIAN

2008-05-24T00:22:00.001-04:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LMN12U88RI

THE NEW RICK ROLL

2008-05-02T00:40:00.004-04:00

When your kids get old enough to appreciate linking their friends to inanity (which will probably be like 5 with our kids) you should point them in the direction of this one. I remember seeing it on MTV or something when it happened initially but then a few days ago I decided it was funny enough to look up to force people to watch. I was right too and after linking a bunch of other doods I realized that it's got potential as the Rick Roll of tomorrow. It's a fruity little bloke singing quirkily about a girl that got away or something like that.. btw, this is the official version of the video for those of you who practice record label loyalty/submission or something like that.

GASSED UP ONE FOOTED SPACE SAVING POLE VAULTER MISTAKENLY RAPS VERY FAST

2008-03-21T01:42:00.008-04:00

Hey y'all, Pat Knight here

All right, first and foremost, does anyone know what’s up with this CITGO Boycott/"Buycott?" Last night I received a bulletin from one of my favorite rappers, Stic. Man of Dead Prez, urging me and millions of others to refrain from purchasing Exxon Mobil gas, the largest oil vendor in the world, for the remainder of the year. It's an attempt to force them to lower their prices and by doing so smaller vendors will have to follow suit. That’s the plan (I’ll have you know that since I received the message I haven’t purchased any Exxon Mobil gas). I’m feeling out of the loop and it's things like this that I find it hard to take a stand on; where it’s not so much my views on a specific issue, but rather my views on the character of another person, namely Hugo Chavez... I’m inclined to listen to Dead Prez on this one. They seem to be pretty on their game when it comes to "revolution" although I can’t condone everything they say or do. Anyway I just want to hear some other opinions about this and feel free to give me a virtual slap upside the head suggesting that I should get with the times.

But enough about me…

MAJOR PROPS to my homegirl KARIN FJELLMAN for introducing me to this gem. I Love the shot at around 2:03-2:04. I was going to try to say something snappy but there are really no words.

Check out this Incredible Furniture solution for the young person/student/whatever who doesn’t want to be tied down by a bunch of stuff during the frequent moves of their 20 something existence. This is just a prototype but I hope that before I "settle down" I will be able to own a Casulo and have to move a few times. Peep it...

Sorry about that one you video snobs, I’ve still got a tween in my heart somewhere that just can’t get enough slapstick.

I mean...she like... really does have heart, cause like, it takes guts to get back out there and admit your mistakes on LIVE TELEVISION. I mean, even Matt Louer makes mistakes sometimes and really, like, she’s only 18 so…

Hey Check out this kid. He's really Dope.

Nam sayin

D I Y

2008-03-11T01:55:00.005-04:00

Hey you should try this recipe I made up

Pats Eggs
Take as many eggs as you want, probably a dozen.
Put them in a pan with water covering them.
Bring that to a rolling boil then turn the heat off and cover them if possible.
Let them sit for 1o minutes.
Pour out the hot water and replace it with cold water and let the eggs cool off

Next make a solution of about 1 part water for every 2 parts apple cider vinegar, enough to submerge all of your eggs in add some salt and a half cup of sugar and whatever spices you think sound good... pepper, cloves, ground mustard etc.

Peel your eggs and place them in the solution, let that sit in your refrigerator for about 3-4 days and presto

PATS EGGS!!!

Here is some more "home brew" for you:

Apparently all you need to do this yourself is a bluetooth enabled computer, a Wii remote, infrared lights and the free software that you can download at http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~johnny/projects/wii/

And here is some old stuff that any hip hop fan with a sense of humor should see:

& I'm out

WE SHARE OUR MOTHER'S HEALTH

2008-03-10T03:11:00.004-04:00

If you hadn't seen it, now you have. Rejoice!

Also, just for good measure:

HEY WHAT IT IS? IT'S YOUR BOY PAT KNIGHT!

2008-03-09T01:45:00.008-05:00

So, as it will become clear as you scroll down, I gave Patrick Knight "authorship" rights/responsibilities so that I could read my own blog when I'm bored. He's probably gonna do a really awesome job of supplying content that I want to look at and he's also a RAP GOD (his group Ckastle Danger is going gangbusters on some De La/ D-E-L, trashing foolishness shit), so don't come around these message boards acting like that's your crown cause you'll get hurt (feelings-wise).

Anyway, to inaugurate Pat I'm gonna post pictures of him followed by pictures of a ridiculous pizza that I saw on someone's Facebook page. This way you can acquaint yourself with the new talent and then feel good about the way you eat.

Pat's studio equipment; Reel to reel, just like the White Stripes (that's their deal isn't it?)

Pat's taste in women; The great thing about dating grandmas is that everything is on them.

Pat's fashion sense

A day in the life of Patrick Knight

Patrick's Rap/Rock side project

While I'm at it, I found out that the guy I was posting about a month or so ago, Ulillillia, is an avid Youtube video poster. All of his videos are video game glitches and they're about as repetitive as everything in his life, but his narration is amazing. "Look at that ground fogged out so much!" Watch the first one for sure, watch the second one if you're bored to tears.

coming soon: content that I actually created

TIME KILLERS

2008-03-08T20:20:00.004-05:00

Hey Errbody! This is Pat Knight and this is my first blog. I hope that this will be the first time you see these things that I am about to reveal to you otherwise this will just be lame.
I want to get some of this. I wonder if you can feel it if you were to cup your hand and lift it.

You should also check out this website. It's these crazy paper cut out models that you can print & make. Some of them look really intricate. I'll let you know if I accomplish any of them. You do the same http://www.creativecloseup.com/100-exceptional-free-paper-models-and-toys

Anyway I have to write a paper so I can spend all of tomorrow indulging in super smash bros brawl

later...

ACTIONBLOG

2008-02-20T15:01:00.002-05:00

I'm enjoying reading week too much to want to be on a computer so this is gonna be short, but I've just been watching some great new videos that I need to add to the archives. Firstly, katanas are back in a big way! Not that they ever left or anything, but I recently learned that there have been like 80 katana murders in the UK in the last 4 years. And I guess it's poor of me to get excited about that, but if people are going to be murdered (which they inevitably will) I'm glad to hear that they're dying by the sword. As testament to the supremacy of the katana, here is a glorified showdown between katana blade and 9mm bullet.

Here's a katana vs. an arrow, but this time the katana is wielded by a guy.

And finally, the coolest thing I've ever seen:

ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT MOVIE

2008-02-11T02:15:00.003-05:00

I read like 20 different write-ups all over the internet tonight explaining that, although it's dependent on numerous factors, there are plans to make an Arrested Development movie. Jason Bateman, Jeffrey Tambor and co-writer Mitchell Hurwitz have all commented that they would like to make the movie, but it's also a matter of rounding up the team, getting whatever approval and waiting for the writer strike to end. I know that it might be too early to get excited, but after hearing a few comments by David Cross some time ago, I had given up hope on any new Arrested Development anything. And having seen every episode a dozen+ times I'm desperately in need of some new Bluth action. If you're interested in reading an article by someone who actually gives a shit about the quality of their blog, presenting valuable information, etc., check out The Balboa Observer-Picayune, which is probably the best AD fan site I've yet seen. Anyway, this is amazing news for everyone. Here's the aforementioned David Cross comments in an interview with that former MTV host Suchin Pak!

3:01

2008-02-10T05:09:00.000-05:00

I've been playing a lot of Super Metroid lately. Like all the way through over and over again. I recently read on some walk through that, (oh and I wasn't actually using it to navigate the game, I'm the pro. I was just looking up how to do the fetal-position-nuclear-absorption heal.) if you beat the game in under three hours you get a wicked resolution involving Samus in a Super slutty bikini. Like Brazilian slutty. Anyway I was doing Super well this recent time through and I thought that the goal was within sight. So I kill that bastard space pirate Mother Brain and some other Super Nintendo kind of mumbo-voodoo Dr. John nonsense happens and I get the clear time and it's.....

FUCKING 3:01

I've got it saved right before the final boss at 2:54 and I even played through the ending again as fast as I could but still came out at 3:01. And honestly I don't even care about the bikini thing. I can see beach babes whenever I want. I've got thousands of girls who want to make out and hot tub all afternoon and I've seen a screen shot of it anyway. I just wanted to be able to say that I'd done it. Then I was looking for pictures to post on this post to liven things up and I found a video of someone doing it in 60 minutes. You probably don't want to watch it all, but it's impressive.

ULILLILLIA

2008-02-08T20:45:00.001-05:00

So last night I was searching the webscape to find that song Girls Gone Wild that I love so much from The Office episode about the paper convention (it's the one playing in Michael's room when he's trying to have a party that nobody shows up to and it turns out it's by some DJs calling themselves Captain Ahab). Anyway, I somehow stumbled across this gem of a case study.

Ulillillia

It's basically this kid's entire life typed out in FAQ format. I don't even need to say much about it, but he's got a really bizarre and severe form of OCD which is exacerbated by and manifested through a SEVERE addiction to video games (which he has now "overcome"). He rarely ever leaves his room and spends large amounts of his time playing a "mind game" which is basically a highly constructed meditation that thematically lands somewhere between Sonic the Hedgehog, Bubsy, Metroid and Super Mario (coincidentally his favorite games). I could write on and on about this, but he does it all for me and the way he explains himself is endlessly interesting if you're intrigued by mental disorders. I don't mean to exploit this poor bloke, but this exhaustive FAQ gives an insight into the depths of obsession and compulsion that is too neat to keep to myself.

PLEASUREBLOGGIN'

2008-01-31T03:48:00.001-05:00

So Akon remade "Wanna Be Startin' Something" with Michael Jackson. It's pretty humorous cause, you know, Akon has a funny voice. I just found some new Gnarls Barkley too, which sounds pretty good to me. I watched Buffalo '66 earlier tonight and thought it was suuuuper good. And speaking of bizarre, suicidal men I just found out about the Bjork stalker. Aaand he's really scary. My freshman year of college I did a project on stalkers and got the skinny on their whole game, so watch this movie and then I'll break it down for you.

so basically all you need to know is:

Stalkers will often denigrate their victims which reduces the victims to objects. This allows stalkers to feel angry at victims without experiencing empathy, or they may feel that they are entitled to behave as they please toward the victims. Viewing victims as "lesser," "weak" or otherwise seriously flawed can support delusions that the victims needs to be rescued, or punished, by the stalkers. Stalkers may slander or defame the character of their victims which may isolate the victims and give the stalkers more control or a feeling of power.

Community surveys suggest that each year between 1% and 2% of women and 0.25% to 0.5% of men are stalked (Australian Bureau of Statistics, 1996; Tjaden and Thoennes, 1998).

I'm watching some VBS and I'm bored with this so I'm out.

RUFFNESS FOH RILLY DOH!

2008-01-15T01:55:00.000-05:00

in hip-hop/rap/R&B/hustlin' news..

Akon threw a guy off a stage a while ago..

There was a better video of this, but those hepcats who broke the sit. down made the cut too. The cool gear and slang had me thinking we were peers until they started dancing and joking like middle school councilors. Also, very insightful about the metal show, Tre..

R Kelly is a FLIRT!

..and these kids are still role models..

..peace guy

WICKED FOOTY

2008-01-10T02:23:00.000-05:00

so tonight I was looking for this..

when I found this..

which was so a vain and sappy that I was compelled to continue on to this..

which is just slotty and hilarious. Like, her boobs... are biiig?